April 2010
It's Simple: If I Don't Ask, I Can't Be Rejected
By Don Connelly
Selling the trifecta. Selling something to somebody is hard enough in the best of times, let alone in times like we are experiencing now. To sell somebody not one, not two, but three things is tougher than trying to kiss somebody who is leaning away from you. But an Advisor must sell three things, in good times and in bad. The Advisor must first sell the appointment, the Advisor must open the account, and the Advisor must get referrals. One, two, three and don't miss a step. I'll bet you a dollar that the inability to close is the number one cause of failure in this industry. Actually, save your money. That's a sucker bet. I know I'm right. Closing is like prospecting. It involves fear of rejection, so too many people steer themselves away from the possibility. And it is flat out not fun. Eat your vegetables. Turn off that television. Ask for the order.
There are two things to focus on when closing any sale. The first thing is that closing a sale involves more than just asking for the order. The second thing is that, if you want to retain your sanity, closing a sale must be such a natural action that there will be no fear or hesitancy on your part at crunch time.
One thing leads to another. To the first point, closing a sale involves more than simply asking for the order in the same way that winning at golf involves more than simply putting well. In order to make a putt, we have to be on, or possibly near, the green. To be on the green, we had to have hit a good approach shot. In order to hit a good approach shot, we have to hit a good tee shot. One action sets up and leads to another action. You want to putt better? Chip the ball better! You want to chip better? Hit a better approach shot! You want to hit a better approach shot? Hit a better tee shot!
Closing steps. Similarly, we can't close the sale or open the account until we have addressed the prospect's questions, fears and objections, each in turn. We can't address the objections until we get them out in the open. We can't get them out in the open until we probe for acceptance or resistance. We can't probe until we have given the presentation. We can't give the presentation until we make an Initial Benefit Statement. We can't make an Initial Benefit statement until we decide on the proper investment approach. We can't decide on the proper investment approach until we know the person's goals. We can't know the person's goals until we have listened. When we finally close the sale, we simply replay the benefits of the specific products we are recommending and we ask for the order. Like the golf swing, there are very few moving parts in selling. The difficulty lies in the fact that each part must be executed flawlessly and in the proper sequence. So, yes, closing a sale is saying the right words. But it's also saying those words at the right time and in the proper sequence. You want to close better? Listen better.
But, if closing a sale is so rudimentary, why is it so difficult to do it gracefully?
It's about the fear of failure. The difficulty lies not in saying the words. The difficulty lies in hearing the answer. It's all about the possible rejection. There is very little good that can be said about hearing the word "no." Be warned, however, that "if I don't ask, I won't be rejected" is not a good career strategy. A far better strategy is to look forward to closing the sale knowing that you will be successful.
Why we fear rejection is petty straight forward. To be told no is to be told we are not good enough. We failed. That's fearful. Everybody wants to be loved and accepted. The fear of not being accepted can be overwhelming. We don't know if the person is going to say yes. He may say no. Oh, Lord, please. I don't want to hear a no. A psychiatrist would probably tell us this whole thing dates back to childhood.
The fact is that selling anything involves rejection. So when, not if, you get rejected, treat it no differently than you would any other part of your job. It happens, that's all. It certainly is not personal. You are going to be knocked down all your life, so you better get used to getting back up. Keep in mind that your goal is to make the sale and you can't make the sale until you ask for the order. So, since you've got to ask, ask! If you get shot down, so what? Hitting .300 lifetime will probably get you into the Hall of Fame.
As well, the consequences of rejection are all too often exaggerated. When you walked into that prospect's office you didn't have him as an account. When you walked out, you didn't have him as an account. So what's changed? Nothing!
Get people to like and trust you. As Marvin Brown would say, if I am going to do business with you, three things must happen. I must like you; I must trust you; and I must feel your products are good for me. Learn to get to the point where people like you and trust you. You will reduce rejection to a trickle. The quicker you try to close a sale, the more likely you will be rejected. If a relationship between you and the prospect develops slowly and results in both of you trusting the other, rejection is far less likely.
And that brings us to the second point. How do we get so good that there is no fear or hesitancy? Well, you know the answer to that.
What makes the great ones great. The very best Financial Advisors are the ones who decided at some point to become great and instituted a plan with a path to greatness. Rejection means nothing to the great ones. Excellent performers simply do the ordinary things extraordinarily well. The great ones don't like doing the unpleasant things any more than you or I do. They just do them. That's what makes them great.
Don't let fear of rejection bully you. Fear of rejection is just like that bully who pushed you around when you were a kid. To this day, you can recall the dread that accompanied you on that walk to school. This guy wasn't going to go away and he wasn't going to get tired of ambushing you, no matter how hard you tried to wish him away. You had to confront him. You had to sic him on somebody else. So one day, you did just that. Maybe you became his friend. Maybe you challenged him to a fight. Maybe you cried so hard when he hit you that you scared him to death. However you did it, you took your life back by confronting your fears. And life got better.
Confronting your fear. I urge you to overcome your fear of rejection by eliminating it, which is rare, or by learning how to control it. Only you can choose the right way to confront it. But confront it you must if you intend to stick around. I urge you to become so good that you know you are going to perform well, no matter what. Ivan Lendl was famous for staying calm during the biggest tennis matches in the world. He told a reporter that there was no reason for him to get excited or nervous on the world stage, because he had practiced so hard that he knew his capabilities. He explained that if you practice enough, there is never a need to be nervous. You know you will prevail. "If I don't practice the way I should, then I won't play the way that I know I can."
Selling is not telling. Selling is closing. Close, yes, but only when the time is right. And don't fear hearing a no. You're going to hear a million of them. Someone saying 'no' does not define your self-worth. You're far bigger than that.
Babe Ruth said baseball changes through the years. It gets milder. So does rejection. And the more you practice your trade, the milder it gets.
To reach Don, just go to his website: www.campconnelly.com - or Don's page on TodaysAdvisor.com: Click here